thich nhat hanh self acceptance quoteCreating new routines can feel challenging if you’re stuck in the mindset of…

1) Having to do it all at once

2) Filling other people’s cup before your own

In last week’s video we talked about where to start without getting overwhelmed. And in this week’s blog we’re tackling filling your cup first and it starts with saying no.

A lack of physical, emotional, spiritual or mental self-care will zap your energy, lead to anxiety, depression, and adrenal fatigue.

Raise your hand if you’re a people pleaser?

Yup, me too or I’ll say a former people pleaser. When I was diagnosed with adrenal fatigue it was a wake-up call for a lifestyle makeover. I still LOVE to be there for others, to make time for them, and support them in the best ways I know how. But I consciously choose to surround myself with people, books, media and activities that fill my cup so I have the energy, compassion, patience and strength to be there for others.

The most dangerous thing about people pleasing is looking for a sense of worth from others approval. That takes your power away. You’re wasting precious energy on trying to make other people happy (which isn’t always possible BTW) when you could be taking time to nourish your mind, body and soul. Become your biggest fan because true happiness comes from inside.

Let’s unpack this a bit.

People pleasing is a deep programming that takes time to reboot but it’s SO very worth it. Letting this mindset go can do wonders for filling up your cup and boosting your self-esteem.

Your inner fear-voice might be saying, “Will people still like me if I say “no? “ The story of what we think the other person will think of us keeps us from saying no. But people that are worth having in your life will not only continue to like you, they’ll appreciate that you’re taking care of yourself. And don’t forget to praise yourself saying YES to yourself.

Here’s a script for saying “No” gracefully I learned my teacher Elizabeth Dialto:

“Thank you much for thinking of me. I’m fully committed right now. Best of luck on the project/event because I know how much work goes into it.”

The powerful thing about setting boundaries is when you do you give others the permission to do the same. You are inadvertently helping others learn to take care of themselves too.

Action Steps:

  1. Feel the fear and test saying “no” to extracurricular activities or engagements that zap your energy and use the extra time to fill your cup with activities, people, books, and events that light your soul on fire.
  2. Write down 5 things that you love about yourself daily.

 Take action and share your experience with us on the Facebook page.